Bring It On: The Kicking Butt and Taking Names Edition

"Clara, put him down." Edward sighed, after getting over the initial shock being beat to the punch.

Let me just say, for the record, that I'm not a usually too temperamental person. Sure, I'm headstrong and biting some times, but not too angry.

But earlier, I was furious.
Angry enough to have the supposed-to-be-dead Ryan looking shocked and sickeningly gorgeous, slammed halfway into a tree by his neck, snarling.

"Clara," Ryan choked, "What the hell is your problem?!"

"My problem?" I yelled. "YOU're my problem! You leave and pretend you're DEAD, which is a whole other tree-slamming entirely, making my sister hurt so badly that right now, I don't think death would equal up to that!" I wasn't hysterical; I was fuming

"Clare, as much as Ed and I both think this is extremely cool of you and, of course, how we'd love to do that to him, too, put him down. Annora will have a cow." Jasper said, smiling grimly.

"Annora can have any farm animal she wants as long as I get to kill this asinine idiotic scum of the Earth."

Edward sighed again. He was getting pretty good at that.
"Fine. Just don't kill him and put him down before Annora sees. But while you're hanging there, you mongrel, you might as well tell us a few things."

Ryan frowned. "Like what? You won't believe me no matter what I say."

Zach came over and looked levelly at Ryan from beside me. "That's for us to know and you to assume."

Edward smirked. "First of all, why death and not just a note or something similar? Faking death isn't exactly subtle."

Ryan snorted. "I'm not you."

"Obviously." Edward said, and I could feel him inwardly cringing, though he didn't show it on the outside.

I tightened my hand around Ryan's neck. "Answer the question, and stop being the biggest jerk faced lying as-"
Jasper coughed, and gave me a look.
"Stop being yourself." I amended hotly.

Ryan looked exasperated.
"Look. I didn't mean to hurt her, or you for that matter, Clara, but I wasn't going to just leave her a note saying "oh, hey, sorry, but I have to leave because I've just betrayed you to the same vampires that have practically stalked you forever. Sorry!' And there's no way I was going to just leave and claim that I didn't love her. You should know better than that."

"You picked DEATH over a NOTE?" Jacob asked, looking horrified. "I knew you guys were off your rail, but that's... That's not even a little bit logical!"

"Yeah, well, it was kind of a spur of the moment thing. Besides, I did keep in contact through the LaPush notes."

Zach shook his head. "You're one retarded vampire. I guarantee you, if you ever get the urge to show up in LaPush again, you're going to end up where you pretended to be in the first place."

Ryan turned his sad eyes on me. "Let me go. I know I was completely wrong, and trust me, never again."

I grudgingly released my grip. As Ryan rubbed his neck though, he was slammed up against the tree again, by Edward.

"What about your 'people'?" he hissed.

Ryan coughed some more. "STOP SLAMMING ME AGAINST TREES! And what the heck do you mean? What about 'my people'?!"

"They're going to come at us harder now, because of you!" Edward's voice sounded so... deadly.

Edward dropped Ryan and turned on his heel, while pain exploded in front of my eyes. It was killing him to live on the other side of something so simliar to what he'd done.

I got home before anyone else that night, and went straight to my room and sat in the chair at the desk until Zach came over. He sat down on the couch and smiled at me sadly.

“I’m sorry.”

I glanced over at him. “What?”

“All of this freakish stuff is going on, and I can’t relate or help or even try to be considerate, just because of who I am. I can’t even talk right.”

I laughed. “You sound perfectly fine.”

“Yeah, but the other night, when I told you that I loved you... I don’t think it came out totally right, and I think it scared both of us.”

He looked over at me curiously, where I was frozen.

“I didn’t mean it like... that. Not yet, anyways, but that’s really awkward, so forget I just said that. I meant that I love you like... Like you’re my sister.”

“Are you lying?”

He smiled grimly. “Nope. Unfortunately, I’m stuck with you forever, though.”

My eyes grew wide. “What?!”

“NO! I mean, well, I’ve kind of already imprinted.”

I blinked, and said what I was thinking slowly. “...On me.”

“Right. But since I’m not totally Quiluette, it’s not a big deal. I just can’t leave you without getting worried sick.”

I kind of snorted. “And... Does Jacob know?”

He laughed. “Yeah, seeing as how we kind read eachother’s mind, he knows. And thinks it’s the dumbest thing he’s ever heard of. But still, he’s got no other choice but deal with it.”

“There’s just one problem.” I pointed out helpfully. “I’m not safe with you.”

Zach’s faced dropped. “Oh?”

“Not in the you-can’t-defend me way, since we’re both pretty much able to do that for ourselves, but my family is my backup, and Alice can’t see me when I’m with you...”

“...which would be always.”

“Exactly. She freaks out a little over it.”

He looked undecidedly down at the couch. “I don’t want to put you in any danger. That’s not what I’m supposed to stick around for.”

I had to smile. He thought that I didn’t want to be around him because Alice wouldn’t be able to see me. I walked over to the couch, and sat down in front of him.
“Zach, come on. I thought you knew me a little better than this.”

He looked at me, intrigued.

“Who said I didn’t want to have some fun in the way of danger? Plus, if I get to hang out with my best friend in the process, double bonus for me.”

He smiled and wrapped me in a bear hug. “You’re insane, Clara, and I’m so glad you are.”

So everything's good, and really, I'm glad. Even if the freaky whosit-purple-eyed things come back, I can't say I won't be ready for a good fight.

-Clara

Taking the Good With the Bad... And the Potentially Awkward.

In the newspaper, there's a headlining article about Ryan.
Because when lost boys turn up dead, it's usually a big story for the press.
But I...
I just don't know.
And I don't mean this in a "well, he's a jerkfaced liar" way, but...
I don't know if that's really him.
Because if so, the Volturri would be here, right?
And they would've disposed of the body and all who'd seen it.
And it most likely would've been them that killed him in the first place.
But still, there's a body.

I'm probably over-analyzing this.
And really, Ann, I'm so sorry. You know that.

---
Cutting that subject. See the line? That would be the cut, kaythankyouverymuch.

Zach came over again tonight, and he's actually up in my room, asleep again (Humans sleep so much! Even the half-human ones!), but I'm not up there.
Because we kind of had this really long, hugely awkward talk tonight, starting with the words "Okay, I know this isn't a great time for this..."

Which, you know, should've told me instantly what I was getting myself into.

"...But I really think we need to talk."
Suuuuure.
The only thing is, that talk was way more important than I thought. The summary of the whole thing:

Zach doesn't think we're friends anymore.
Oh, no. He think's we're more than that.

But I don't know what to tell him, because I haven't really thought of it in that way. It's so weird, having a best friend who comes all out and tells you he's in love with you.
Of course, it doesn't help if when the devoter expresses this, the devotee laughs until she can't breathe.

So he's kind of embarassed about it, add it's my fault, but that would be why I don't really date.

Let me just LIST the reasons, shall I?
I. I'm dead.
II. You'd think that people would notice I'm dead when they try to hold my hand and it's rock solid and cold.
III. Living rocks DO NOT make good people to cuddle up to.
IV. A long story involving a guy who I was engaged to 79 years ago.
V. My family tends to put anything with any kind of heartstring connection to them in major danger.

That would be only five. Trust me, there's SO much more.

-Clara

Ps - YEAH, I know, okay? Not a long post. But still, ya know?

In and Out? Or Out and In?

I can't breathe. I can't talk, I can't see straight, I can't function.

I spent the last week in Boston, because I thought that would help me get over this weird feeling I've had for a while, and you know what, I was right. It's gone.

But it's been replaced with total and complete pain.

My brother, the one who loved me unconditionally, was killed, along with his daughter, her husband, and their child in a wreck the second day I was there. In fact, I was at the intersection it happened in, when it happened. But I was too late. I wasn't paying attention, just trying to act like a normal human, and in that moment all of my remaining family was hit by an oncoming semi.

Why does this happen?! I know there may be no God for me, but they were the nicest people I could ever imagine living with.

I could've saved them! I could've jumped in-between the two vehicles and prevented this whole thing!

I'm a monster in more ways than one.

I stayed for their funerals, too. It was awkward, getting strange looks from people who had no clue who I was, but probably grew up with me.

"We come here today to witness the passing of Cole, Brian, Alecia, and Cody Laylan, all of who perished in an untimely death two days ago..."

Horrible. Nothing amounts to that.

I got off the plane and picked up my car, my yellow hybrid of something that Edward had gotten me when I moved from Alaska, and went to the beach for a while. Alice was most likely going to freak out, not being able to see me, and Edward would be a tad pissed, but that didn't matter. They weren't my family; I had none of that.

It was like any remaining humanity I had vanished with them.

When I finally got home, it was late, and Edward sat stoically on the porch, warily reading my face.
"Clara...?"
I shook my head, and he nodded, his expression not changing, and vanished inside, leaving me standing on the porch, my arms folded against my body.
Less than a minute later, I could hear protesting inside the house as a figure sauntered out of the house and watched me for a minute, before coming over to me and wrapping me in a hug.

I started crying, choked, tearless cries, my head buired in Zach's jacket as he whispered condolences in my hair.

For a werewolf, he was good at being incredibly human sometimes.

Inside, everyone had gone to doing their own thing, Zach carrying me up to my room. He sat me down on my bed, and just let me cry for a while, putting his jacket over me. When I finally calmed down, I pulled my knees up to my chest and let him tell me about Annora and Ryan, and everything that had gone on while I was gone. Alice hadn't, obviously, seen me coming back like this, so a party had been planned. He filled me in on what'd gone on over at La Push, and this fight Jacob had gotten into with Embry, who didn't see any problem with Zach and I being friends.

Zach ended up falling asleep in my bed, and that's where he still is.

It's strange to hear someone snoring, for once.

-Clara.

Suck on THIS, You Creeps.

New vampires are horrible. Absolutely, positively, inexcusably horrible.
There's one close by.

I was lying in my bed, pretending I was sleeping, when this pure, unadulterated pain hit me like a brick in the face, starting from my foot and raging throughout my entire body as quick as you can ask why.
The hurt was so intolerable that I couldn't move. It was like I was paralyzed, colors flashing in the inside of my skull, sounds of crickets outside magnified to such levels that it was almost unbearable.

And all of the sudden, it flared up, blinding me, and then disappeared completely.

I 'woke up', per say, to Emmett and Edward standing over me, frowning. Edward had this nasty snarl on his face, and Emmett... Well, Emmett just looked worried.

"There's one close by, then." Ed said, more of a statement than a question. Those familiar lines between his eyebrows creased. "Surprise, surprise."

We don't know who it is, obviously, and Alice didn't see them coming. They have no intention of hurting us, I guess, since Alice is supposed to be watching the family, including Bella and Jacob (Bella's request... I'm still trying to avoid her. Heartache sucks.) extremely closely.

Either way, Carlisle went "hunting" for more than food, and Jacob's stalking around Bella's house. Edward left, and he's with Bella, too. Leaving her with a dog bugs him to no end, so it's probably better, but I miss him extremely.

The shopping trip is cancelled. Alice is working overtime.

Stupid, dumb, freaky things.
Even a coincidence has everyone panicking.

-Clara